We're a very anxious demographic, aren't we, us grown up Millennials? Just a bunch of hot, fuckin' anxious messes, out here doing what we can, with the so, so, so little we have – but that's a whole 'nother story for a whole 'nother day.

Today, however, we're talking about why your average Millennial is such an anxious mess all the damn time. Why are we like this? What traumas did we need to endure to end up this way? Do psychologists think collective millennial anxiety is really a thing — or do they think we’re just being collectively dramatic and need to collectively shut the fuck up? And what exactly can we do to mitigate this crippling, generationally-defining anxiety? 

In this post, we’re covering all this and more. So get comfy, grab you your favorite anti-anxiety medication (but only if prescribed — I’m in no way, shape, or form encouraging recreational use of prescription medicine), and let’s talk more about why you’re such an anxious mess all the damn time — and what to do about it.

Gen Y? More like Gen “Y us???”

Personally, I am a textbook case of overwhelming millennial anxiety – which has pretty much become our generation's most defining and notable characteristic. Each generation has one of these, after all — and this is the cross we are now fortunate enough to bear.

Take the Boomers, for instance, who live life like they’re in a 50s sitcom. They’re hopelessly optimistic, wholeheartedly in support of any and all post-COVID RTO mandates, have zero idea how to work those pesky smartphones, and are delusional enough to believe that the American dream is still alive and well in 2025. 

Then there’s Gen X, who’s basically the generation of “cool aunts” we love to hang out with at family events. Everyone knows they were absolutely feral back in their youths (thanks to minimal Boomer parent oversight), but now they’re just here to hang and give generally-solid advice to the rest of us. 10/10 — everyone is a fan of Gen X. 

(Oh, and they have the absolute best taste in music. Can’t forget that.)

Finally… We have the Millennials, also known as Gen Y. But to be honest, Gen Y is more like an abbreviation for Gen "Y us?" due to the fact that Millennials are just anxious as fuck all the time. Total basketcases barely holding it together. An entire generation ready to snap without warning and without much reason.

While anxiety itself is not unique to those born between the late 80s to mid-90s, Millennials just take the concept of anxiety and really run with it. They possess a level of anxiety in basic day-to-day tasks that you don’t see in non-Millennials.

For example, I guarantee you that I will absolutely be Googling the parking situation before going anywhere for the first time.  And if I can't figure out an ironclad parking plan ahead of time — I’m talking exact parking coordinates typed into my little Apple Map — I will be so anxious about where I’m going to park for a majority of the drive.

Similarly, don’t even think about asking me to make a phone call without allowing me ample time to script and rehearse beforehand. I need time to practice scheduling a dentist appointment or making a reservation. These sorts of things cannot be rushed — and these sorts of things are uniquely Millennial.

But for whatever reason — even though we know we’re being a lot a lot of the time — we just can’t stop being this way. It’s just who we are. It’s in our Millennial blood. And it’s what makes us so damn endearing.

A Non-Comprehensive List of Childhood Traumas that Made Millennials Collectively Anxious AF

But why, exactly, are Millennials so anxious? Where exactly did all of this anxiety come from? Because it’s not just one or two Millennials out here acting like nutcases — it’s all of us. So something must’ve happened to universally make all of us like this.

When we talk about the root of this collective millennial anxiety, I think the most natural starting point is the very beginning. So let’s think back to that moment where we, as a group, were first introduced to trauma, instability, and this idea of “anxiety” for the first time.

For me at least, the first thing that comes to mind is September 11, 2001. That’s really the first time in my life I remember something happening on a global scale that had all the adults around me running around in a total frenzy like, “WTF is going on!! Quick — empty the grocery stores of toilet paper!!”

However, had September 11 been an isolated “WTF is happening, batten down the hatches” event, I think we could’ve recovered generationally. Kids are pretty resilient — and forgetful. But September 11 wasn’t a one-off, traumatic event in an otherwise rose-colored childhood. No, no no — it was pretty much a turning point. A precursor of more and more things to come. The first unfortunate event in a total onslaught of bad, bad, bad that would mark decades to come.

Now, the following list is anything but comprehensive. But when I sat down for a few minutes to brainstorm all the traumatic, once-in-a-lifetime, unprecedented experiences Millennials have endured — most of which during our most formative, brain-developing years — here’s what I came up with.

• First and foremost: Terrorism. This was a big one for us. In addition to 9/11, the Boston Bombing, DC sniper, and anthrax mail scare are three terror attacks that quickly came to mind.

• We were constantly bombarded by Islamaphobia. We could barely turn on the television for a decade without being told that "all Muslims are evil, and they are trying to bring down our country at every opportunity." And as inaccurate as this xenophobic messaging was, it was nonetheless alarming to hear as a child over and over and over again.

• We also had epidemics. Ebola, bird flu, mad cow disease. There was illness everywhere!

• And of course, we can’t forget about pandemics. Remember COVID? I’m sure you do. The Groundhog’s Day that had all of us boarded up and arguing about whether or not science existed for two years. That was... interesting. And poorly-handled.

• There were also market crashes, recessions, & inflation. And now things have reached the point where the cost of living is basically unaffordable if you want anything decent. 👍🏼

• Plus, there was so much nationwide political unrest! The rise of MAGA on Twitter brought with it not just one Trump presidency... but TWO. 

There were also murder hornets somewhere in the mix, but we were so desensitized by things going wrong by that point that hardly anyone paid attention. Just a casual Tuesday evening report from CNN, really. Nothing to pay attention to there…

But as you can see, Millennials have lived through bad thing after bad thing after bad thing for just about our entire lives. So considering the fact that anxiety comes from a fear of the unknown, it’s really no surprise that Millennials ended up being so damn anxious all the damn time. Quite literally, unknown dangers have lurked around every single corner since we’ve been — what?? — ten years old. 

Who wouldn't be an anxious mess??

“You’re An Anxious Mess” -Science (2023)

Calling millennials anxious as fuck isn't just me being extra. I'm someone who believes in cold, hard, “fuck your feelings” facts, so I decided to do my research. When writing this post, I came across this article from the APA published back in 2023, which is all about how Millennials are objectively more anxious than previous generations. According to the study, psychologists found that (*ahem*):

• Younger adults generally handle stress worse than older adults;

• 18- to 34-year-olds reported higher average stress levels (6/10) than folks sixty-five and older reported (3.4/10);

• 67% of 18- to 34-year-olds reported feeling "consumed" by money worries, compared to 13% of those sixty-five and older;

• 67% of 18- to 34-year-olds reported that stress makes it hard to focus;

• 18- to 34-year-olds reported that on 58% of days their stress levels are "completely overwhelming";

• 74% of 18- to 34-year-olds believe it is harder to connect with people today than it was in the past.

So if you think Millennials are just being collectively dramatic when we talk about feeling anxious often, you are not correct. Most of us are anxious on most days, thanks to things like underdeveloped coping skills (thank you, elders), money worries (thank you, unstable economy), and struggling to feel connected to others (thank you, social media).

Just a real breeding ground for anxiety to flourish, huh? 

How to Function in Society when You're an Anxious Mess

By this point, we’ve established that Millennials are anxious as fuck and for good reason. There’s no denying that. So if you can relate to being an anxious individual — Millennial or not — there’s really two ways to approach your “next steps.”

First, you can either fully lean into being an anxious mess, decide to do nothing about it, and dwell in your anxieties. If that’s your chosen path, no shame. I get it. We’ve all let our anxiety fully consume us at one point or another. It happens.

But there is a second option if you don’t want to exist so anxiously. Although there’s no miracle cure (or else I’d be telling you what it is right now), you can at least try to mitigate some of the anxiety in order to go out and function in the world beyond your home.

So if you’ve got the mental capacity to try combatting anxiety, here are some things that help me when I’m feeling like an anxious mess. Now, would I say that this is all good advice? The kind you’d get from a professional? No — not at all. But if you’ve exhausted yourself reading all the carbon copy self-help guides online and feeling desperate for something new, here’s what I can offer.

(Disclaimer: In case you didn’t pick up on this yet, I am NOT a licensed or professional mental health expert — I just play one on the internet. Therefore, I have zero qualifications to provide sound mental health advice. Please talk to a real expert if you are struggling. 🫶🏼)

Good Advice: Get you some therapy.

I need therapy. You need therapy. We all need therapy. I'm like Oprah – the Oprah of recommending people to get therapy. And even if you're not going through the most life-altering, traumatic situation, having a therapist is like having a built-in bestie that you can just absolutely unload upon, while they just listen and give you good feedback... And you don't even have to feel bad when you get so self-absorbed in your woe-is-me'ing that you forget to ask them about themselves. Because even if you do remember to ask them how they're doing, they'll just turn the conversation right back onto you.

Meh Advice: Have yourself a glass of wine... or two.

Or three or four. Whatever makes you happy, really – although I'd probably advise from overdoing it since these hangovers hit oh-so differently these days.

Questionable Advice: Remind yourself that two trillion years from now – once the sun engulfs the earth, and the planet is nothing more than star dust – literally none of your stressors will even matter.

This idea started as an inside joke between childhood besties... but has evolved into one of my core lifestyle mantras. When things start to feel overwhelming, just remind yourself that literally none of this will matter two trillion years from now when the planet doesn't even exist any more. 

For example, think about the dinosaurs: Do their problems matter any more? Does it matter that Mr. Triceratops was hungry but couldn't go out and find himself some leaves to eat without worrying that Mr. T-Rex down the street would mow him down? Abso-fucking-lutely not. Similarly, the T-Rex in your life won't matter either trillions of years from now.

TL;DR

You're an anxious mess because everything’s gone to shit your entire life – but research sees, hears, and validates you. Sure, we may be living in the end times, but if there's one generation ready to face the end of the world with stoicism, grace, and disassociation, it's yours, boo. So have yourself a fat glass of wine, hire a therapist bestie, and chill tf out.  You’ve got this.